When I completed my career in digital media I had one goal, which was to find something better.
At my last job in that industry, once it became public that I had put in my notice my coworkers began to ask me about my plan. At first I was nervous to say I didn’t have one, but after awhile something else happened.
I felt FREE.
Ever since I was a teenager (and potentially before that) I had been asked to have a plan.
What will you do when you grow up? What college will you go to? What major will you pick? What internship will you take? What job do you want? What’s your five-year plan? How much will you put into your 401k? When will you get married? Will you have kids?
It was exhausting. I never felt like I had a sufficient answer, or really any answer at all. And faking it requires a lot of energy. (This topic could be an entirely separate post.)
The idea that we need to or should have a plan for something at every stage of our life is – in my opinion – ludicrous. It’s also dare I say selfish, because it leaves out a big piece of the puzzle, that piece being Spirit.
If there is one thing I’ve learned in the last 2.5 years, it is this: When we are open to receiving the plan, the plan will be shown to us. Because there is a plan, and Spirit wants to help. All you have to do is create the opening to receive it.
This alone explains why I felt so free upon relinquishing my plan: because I didn’t need it in the first place.
When I chose to surrender control, I finally allowed something far greater than me to take over for a change. It’s worth noting that I was an Atheist at the time, so the idea that I would be supported in this way was not in my wheelhouse when I first left my job. Furthermore, I was a Type-A lover of control, so for a long time this went against every bone in my body – and sometimes it still does.
But the Universe is patient, and it has shown me time and time again that everything doesn’t need to be so hard. Eventually I’ve begun to see that all I need is a goal, or an intention – and the looser, the better.
Let me share some examples of what I mean:
I had a goal to leave New York, so I planned to move to California. I moved to Arizona.
I had a goal to take a year off. I started coaching three months later.
I had a goal to find more meaning in life, and admittedly I had NO plan here. I later “found God.”
I had a goal to serve more people, so I planned a retreat. Everyone asked me about 1:1 coaching.
You get the idea.
Every time I thought I knew or tried to control the plan, it went a different way – and thank goodness, because it has turned out better than I could have imagined (and I like to think I have a pretty good imagination.)
Now, what I am not saying is to set a goal and then sit around and do nothing. Actually, it’s quite the opposite. The key is to take consistent action, but you can take it one step at a time. The Universe will actually respond better that way, and with each step you’ll be shown the next one. It’s when you rush around with tunnel vision trying to figure everything out at once that the inspiration can’t get through. You must create the space.
When I set out to find something better, something better eventually found me. It’s partly because I believed it would, and partly because it was already there, waiting to be found. Everything I ever wanted was on the other side of a making a decision, including things I didn’t even know I wanted.
Had I not surrendered again and again, I would have blown right past the best relationship I have ever been in. I would have blown past the opportunity to live somewhere where I could hike and be outside all the time, which was in my ideal scene. I would have blown past my desire to have a closer relationship with my parents, and so much more.
I would have missed it all.
Also, when I started to write this my plan was to talk about how there is no right or wrong way to go about changing your career. Go figure.